As my dad was going through old files today, he found the Agape talk that I gave in 8th grade at Annunciation Orthodox School. If you’re not familiar with AOS and Agape talks, let me explain. AOS is Greek. In Greek, Agape means love. It’s not just love, but the it’s of the highest form of the word and is the kind that God has for man.

In middle school, the morning meetings we had every day after second period were always called Agape. Someone from each class had a job. Someone from fifth grade would give a Quote of the Day, sixth grade would give a Current Event of the Day, and someone from 7th and 8th grade would give an Agape talk.

My dad found the one I gave in 8th grade on my 14th birthday. I chose to speak out about my brother, how the world treats him, and how we treat each other. I was also trying to make a stab at the end of people using the word “retarded.” Appropriately, it came just 3 weeks after September 11. The talk made me smile when I read it after my dad found it this afternoon, and I thought I would share it.

“Although he can’t speak with words, he communicates well. He speaks through signs and his eyes and his soft touch. Although he can’t write or read, he knows people; he senses their feelings and knows how to react. When he isn’t feeling well, he knows how to take care of himself until he is better. He does not know prejudice or hatred, only love and acceptance. He does not know anxiety, turmoil, or depression, only contentment, peace and happiness. He is one of the wisest people we know. Unfortunately, some people use the word ‘retarded.'” 

My name is Lauren Kelly, and today, I’m going to talk to you about what it’s like to have brother with Down syndrome. The paragraph I just read you was the last paragraph of a story called, “A Special Gift.” My father wrote the story in 1995 about my brother, Adam. In the story, my father makes him sound like any other normal child until the last paragraph. In some ways, my brother is like any other normal child. Like any other normal older brother, he enjoys annoying me. Although he can’t do this with words, he likes to do things like sit by me on the couch and tap my shoulder until it gets extremely irritating, or pull my seat belt when he’s sitting behind me in the car. If I react by yelling at him to stop, he thinks it’s the funniest thing in the world. In some ways, he feels like a little brother. For one, although he is 19, he is shorter than I am, and since he’s not really in a grade level at school, he doesn’t know as much as I do. He is in a special education class at T.H. Rogers School consisting of children with disabilities.

One thing that is difficult is that, wherever we go with him, people stare at him. As his little sister, the first thing that pops into my head is, why do they do that? Because he is different. Well, what’s wrong with behing different? Nothing. As my dad put in the story, “he does not prejudice or hatred, only love and acceptance.” Although my brother accepts everyone, not everyone accepts him. Being different is bad. But being prejudiced against someone who is different is a struggle for many people. Although many of us probably think, well I’m not prejudiced against anyone, some of us probably are. It happens every day.

Even here. Think of the word “groups.” In most grades, there is a popular group, and an unpopular group. There wouldn’t be any groups if no one were prejudiced. So my challenge to all of us is, accept everyone. No matter how popular, not matter what race, religion, or belief, just accept them. We don’t have to be best friends, but we shouldn’t push each other away. And the next time you see my brother, don’t be scared of him because he really is very gentle, loving person. Many people look at him and think of a boy with Down syndrome, but to me, he is just my brother.

October 3, 2001